September 27, 2018
This Monday, as I was preparing myself for the work I would be doing on the Heart Chakra for our Chama Yoga class, I became aware of the sound of my younger daughter’s voice as she was engaging with our cat, Koro. Until then, my daughter has maintained a limited and fearful relationship with our recently adopted feline friend. Every interaction between them since he’s joined our family two months ago has begun with her tentatively reaching her hand out to him, awkwardly petting his face and neck, which within moments causes the young tan and white Tabby to think it’s P.L.A.Y.T.I.M.E!!! (his excitement connoted here) and immediately commence to nibbling and scratching at her. This invariably sets off her fear of being torn to shreds by the cat and she commences to shriek out panicked screams of “No, Koro! No!” followed by “MOMMY!!!” So, to hear her voice this time, not only calm, but actually soothing as she engaged with him, really caused me to pause. Peeking into the room, I saw her sitting on the floor with him sprawled out in front of her folded legs as she rubbed his belly, engaging in the sweetest expressions. She affirmed him, petted him, and even giggled as he purred! It was a simple and common scene, but for this child of mine, it was a magnificent first. In that moment, I realized, she was no longer afraid and therefore she was able to tap in to her loving presence.
It’s funny how the simplest things help guide us to such important messages.
Inevitably, I found myself pondering the nature of this practice in my every day experiences and in the experiences we (insert any way we identify) find ourselves.
I asked myself, How often is our ability to be loving hindered by our fears?
As with my daughter, I believe the nature of humans is to be, express and receive love. Because of so many factors, we find ourselves living in varying degrees of perpetual fear. Fear and love, according to wisdom teachings, don’t exist in the same space at the same time. One takes over, even if for a moment, and in that moment the words spoken, actions taken, and decisions made are based on the one we’ve submitted to. The beautiful or difficult (depending on whether we’re assessing with love or fear) part of this is, we get to choose which takes over. Every single time.
When I pondered this experience between my daughter and Koro, I saw the parallels to how we humans engage with one another: Because my daughter had submitted to her fears about the cat, she was nervous around him, didn’t engage much with him and even asked if he could be sent away. I spent a lot of time trying to work with her on her fears and to understand his nature so that she could more comfortably engage with him. She was open to trying. Once she had the breakthrough interaction with him that went smoothly, she was able to overcome the fears she was holding. She was able to relax herself, which relaxed him, and they both engaged without anxiety. The resulting interaction further dissipated her fears, allowing her to express with him how she expresses with most other beings on the planet, in her own unique loving way. Her voice, mannerisms and speech were all so gentle, beautiful and vastly different from how she looked and sounded in all prior times she engaged with our pet.
It made me think about how separatists treat those they don’t identify with; how some people in our country treat those they label as ‘foreigners;’ how many in power treat those who have been dis-empowered; how we allow fear to win, creating the illusions of I vs. You and Us vs. Them until love can find no footing between the chasm of conceived divisions. It brought forth this poem:
Fear shall find no refuge where love has anchored harbor.
Fear shall take no root where love has nourished the soil.
Fear shall enjoy no recline where love has claimed a throne.
And fear shall take no refuge in the space where love resides.
It requires daily, hourly, and moment-by-moment work to choose love, but it is a choice. If I were to analogize the state of the world I wish to live in to the shrill sound of fright my daughter used to exclaim versus the sweet melodic sound of her loving voice, I am clear which I’d like to hear reverberating for my eternity. I choose sweetness. I choose calmness. I choose laughter and joy and ecstasy! I choose to try harder to choose love.
Holistic Living by Keny Moon 